Sayings: On T-shirts

**DaveMo~** · 12-12-2002, 11:55 PM

Here are some memorable t-shirts that I've seen, and maybe owned:

My imaginary friend thinks you have mental problems.
Nice face! What are you gonna' do when the baboon wants his butt back?
Support human cloning! Two heads are better than one.
Shut up brain, or I'll stab you with a Q-Tip!
I'm not getting smaller, I'm backing away from you.
Did you eat a bowl of stupid for breakfast?
I wear the brains in the family.
I don't know what makes you dumb, but it really works.
There's too much blood in my alcohol system.
If a man speaks in the middle of a forest and there is no woman to hear him, is he still wrong?
You're just jealous because the voices talk to me.
Don't interrupt me while I'm talking with myself!
Marriage is not a word; it's a sentence.
I'm with stupid >>>
No sense in being pessimistic. It wouldn't work anyway!
It's only funny until someone gets hurt. Then it's hilarious.
People like you are the reason people like me need medication.
Oh crap! You're going to try and cheer me up, aren't you?
My mom says I must have been a gifted child because she certainly wouldn't have paid for me!
Save the trees. Wipe your butt with an owl!
Do not disturb! I'm disturbed enough already.
Due to budget cuts, the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off.
I'm sorry. My fault. I forgot you were an idiot.
Excuse, but do I look like someone who cares?
If you can't say something funny about someone, don't say anything at all.
The world is a strange place. Let's keep it that way!
I woke up on the wrong side of life.
WARNING! All stressed out and I haven't choked anyone today.
There's one in every crowd, and I'm it.
Keep watching. Maybe I will do a trick!
If I got smart with you, how would you know?
To save time, let's just assume that I know everything.
Sarcasm is just one more FREE service we offer.
If I flush, will you go away?
GRABERBOOTIE & PINCH
My girlfriend told me to be more affectionate, so I got two girlfriends.
5 out of 4 people have problems with fractions!
If you have something to say, please raise your hand and put it over your mouth!
Do I look like your therapist?
I live in my own little world. It's okay! They know me here.
Normal people scare me!
I can only please one person per day, and today is not your day. Tomorrow does not look good either.
OH! I get it! You don't own a full length mirror.
I'm in no shape to exercise.
You need someone listening to you for it to be an actual conversation.
Do I seem self-centered, or is it just me?

Dave

**ghettocars** · 12-12-2002, 11:59 PM

lol these are great

**conkermaniac** · 12-13-2002, 07:53 AM

LOL, Dave, thanks!

Could I just ask one question? How do you remember all these T-shirt sayings?

**DaveMo~** · 12-16-2002, 06:53 PM

I have a photographic memory, but sometimes it's always negative.

Actually, when I see one that I like, I write it down.

Dave

**conkermaniac** · 12-17-2002, 07:47 AM

Hi Dave,

I'm not sure if this is a t-shirt saying or not, but I see it everywhere, and I love it!

"There are three types of people in this world - those who can count and those who can't."

**goirulz** · 12-17-2002, 08:35 AM

Hi Dave,

Those are some hilarious T-shirt sayings! Although I don't know any t-shirt sayings, I do remember one particular bumper sticker message, which said "If you can read this, then I've lost my trailer"

**ghettocars** · 12-18-2002, 06:18 PM

I like the bumper sticker: "Dont drink and drive, you might hit a bump and spill your drink"

other T-Shirt sayings:

"sorry you looked cute from far away"

"girls are like parking spaces, all the good ones are taken, and the ones that are left are handicaped" <---suggest against buying this shirt.

"free brethalizer test (arrow pointing down)"

**KeithMcL** · 12-30-2002, 04:37 PM

I thought of doing something like this on www.cafepress.com once. Making up my own ones and then try and sell'em.

**TimSchroeder** · 12-30-2002, 08:45 PM

Actually could be a REALLY great idea Keith!

Funny-Apparel.com (taken?)...

**KeithMcL** · 12-31-2002, 05:09 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Chief
Actually could be a REALLY great idea Keith!

Funny-Apparel.com (taken?)...

Try it out so. You could even run a contest here for funny sayings with a free T-Shirt as the top prize or something along those lines.

**KeithMcL** · 12-31-2002, 05:10 PM

Oh btw, if it works out, I reckon I should get a free one for the idea

**love1** · 01-10-2003, 10:31 AM

some historic trivia

A true story...

When Apollo Mission Astronaut Neil Armstrong first walked on the
moon, he not only gave his famous "One small step for man, one
giant leap for mankind" statement, but followed it by several
remarks, usual communication traffic between him, the other
astronauts and Mission Control. Just before he re-entered the
lander, however, he made the enigmatic remark

"Good luck, Mr. Gorsky."

Many people at NASA thought it was a casual remark concerning some rival Soviet Cosmonaut. However, upon checking, there was no Gorsky in either the Russian or American space programs. Over the years many people have questioned him as to what the "Good luck, Mr. Gorsky" statement meant.

A few months ago, (July 5, 995 in Tampa Bay, FL) while answering
questions following a speech, a reporter brought up the 26 year
old question to Armstrong. This time he finally responded.
Mr. Gorsky had finally died and so Neil Armstrong felt he could
answer the question.

When he was a kid, he was playing baseball with a friend in the
backyard. His friend hit a fly ball which landed in the front of
his neighbor's bedroom windows. His neighbors were Mr. and Mrs. Gorsky. As he leaned down to pick up the ball, young Armstrong heard Mrs. Gorsky shouting at Mr. Gorsky. "Oral sex! You want oral sex?! You'll get oral sex when the kid next door walks on the moon!"

**KeithMcL** · 01-10-2003, 07:22 PM

Excellent story love1. I got a good chuckle out of that one. Thanks

**DaveMo~** · 01-10-2003, 11:06 PM

There are two types of people in this world:
1. People who finish what they start.
2.

**vulpix1337** · 01-12-2003, 06:40 AM

haha
it is great

**MaiBalz** · 01-16-2003, 09:22 AM

i like this one, i actually have this shirt and it comes i handy. When i bought it i bought it to show it to my sister in law because i always argue with her and she says that i always have to be right and its been useful in school too.
actually im wearing it right now!-

it goes like this...
--Im not opinionated Im just always RIGHT!--

-Mai

**ghettocars** · 01-16-2003, 09:29 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by love1
some historic trivia

A true story...

When Apollo Mission Astronaut Neil Armstrong first walked on the
moon, he not only gave his famous "One small step for man, one
giant leap for mankind" statement, but followed it by several
remarks, usual communication traffic between him, the other
astronauts and Mission Control. Just before he re-entered the
lander, however, he made the enigmatic remark

"Good luck, Mr. Gorsky."

Many people at NASA thought it was a casual remark concerning some rival Soviet Cosmonaut. However, upon checking, there was no Gorsky in either the Russian or American space programs. Over the years many people have questioned him as to what the "Good luck, Mr. Gorsky" statement meant.

A few months ago, (July 5, 995 in Tampa Bay, FL) while answering
questions following a speech, a reporter brought up the 26 year
old question to Armstrong. This time he finally responded.
Mr. Gorsky had finally died and so Neil Armstrong felt he could
answer the question.

When he was a kid, he was playing baseball with a friend in the
backyard. His friend hit a fly ball which landed in the front of
his neighbor's bedroom windows. His neighbors were Mr. and Mrs. Gorsky. As he leaned down to pick up the ball, young Armstrong heard Mrs. Gorsky shouting at Mr. Gorsky. "Oral sex! You want oral sex?! You'll get oral sex when the kid next door walks on the moon!"

poor Mr. Gorsky, did he ever get his wish?

**ffa_rebel_420** · 01-17-2005, 08:56 PM

I have a couple of saying my friends have on their shirt, Its all fun and games till someone looses a weiner (picture of stick people roasting hot dogs) life is a lot like a mullet kinda long kinda short, and no one understands why?

**sdcdesign.co.uk** · 01-17-2005, 09:58 PM

Brilliant Dave

As embarrasing as it is, this one actually got me laughing out loud in my study:

"5 out of 4 people have problems with fractions!".

Regards,

Sean

**Mooofasa** · 01-18-2005, 03:51 AM

Ohh. I thought I wasn't alone then (with the photographic memory and all).

I have a t-shirt but I would rather not say it.

I like the t-shirts that say:
"I'm with stupid >>>"

--twitch